29 Jul 2019
Going Vegan Tips, Holistic Health, Vegan Lifestyle, Vegan Nutrition
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Mindful Eating: Why and How

What comes to mind when you hear the term, “mindful eating”? 

For much of my adult life, eating was either about controlling the appearance of my body or numbing negative emotion. The transformation I went through however, completely changed the way I experience food! (If you’d like to learn more about my personal journey, click HERE.)

Eating mindfully makes a HUGE positive impact on my own life, as well as the lives of our Plant-Empowered Coaching Program clients. We’re even doing a mindful eating CHALLENGE in our free Empowered Vegan Life Facebook group (if you haven’t joined our incredible group, join us HERE now)!

Here’s what Jamie Rottura, one of our inspirational Program graduates has to offer to help you jump start the habit of eating mindfully…

The term “mindful eating” can seem quite vague to many people.  It is tough to imagine what it looks like to eat with intention.  The term denotes eating while in a meditative state… but what does that mean?

Before I began the Plant-Empowered Coaching Program (PECP), I would eat at designated times of day (i.e. breakfast, lunch and dinner, respectively), usually in-between tasks or while working.  I shoveled my food into my mouth because I had waited to eat until I was so hungry that I NEEDED food or I would pass out. Then, I would eat until I was too full to move and be angry at myself and unable to do much for a good hour or so after. 

I didn’t realize it at the time, but this ONE thing made me feel so badly about myself.  I would feel sluggish and look at myself in the mirror thinking about how gross and gluttonous I was. I would go into a spiral of negative emotions about my body, therein feeling depressed and overwhelmed.  One meal could cause me to hate myself, back then. 

The mindfulness tools we learn within PECP have taught me how to break that awful cycle.  I now enjoy eating on a whole new level while also appreciating my body throughout the entire process. Eating is no longer another “task”… It is an experience that I look forward to without guilt or anger.  I taste flavors, feel textures and pay attention to the smell of food in a way that helps me savor every meal. 

Next time you sit down for a meal, try some of these tips that we practice in PECP:

  • Choose foods that fuel you instead of foods that are just there when you’re hungry.   
  • Chew food to a pulp before swallowing.
  • Ask yourself if you are enjoying the flavor and texture of the food.
  • Smell the food before each bite.
  • When you sit down to eat, make that the “thing” you are doing at the time.  Turn off the TV and other mindless distractions and enjoy the meal.  
  • Listen to your body’s reactions to foods. Ask yourself, “How do I feel when I eat this particular food? Does it make me feel energized or depleted? Am I satisfied or still hungry?”
  • Before you choose a particular food or meal, ask yourself, “Do I really want this right now?” If the answer is yes, then take a little at a time. If the answer is no, feel open to leaving that option off of your plate.
  • Remind yourself that you DO NOT have to finish the entire plate of food (that’s why storage containers were invented)!

Eating is an experience, not a means to an end. Enjoy every bite! 

29 Jul 2019
Empowerment, Holistic Health, Vegan Lifestyle
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My Story in a Nutshell

PART I

It all started when I was seven years old. 

My mom had picked me up after school to take me to gymnastics practice and asked how my day was. I told her we had learned about Daniel Boone (in case you don’t know, Daniel Boone was one of our first American folk heroes who infamously carried around a shotgun and wore a raccoon hat). 

I was confused. “Daniel Boone was supposed to be a hero mom, but he was not.” I said. “He was a mean man. He killed and ate animals!”

My mom was honest with me. She said, “Well Ella, we are just fortunate now-a-days. Unlike Daniel Boone, we get to go to the grocery store to buy our meat.” 

It was at that moment that I connected the food on my plate with the animal that it was. I was horrified! I told my mom, “I’m not going to do that anymore.” 

That was it – I never ate meat again.

I was extremely fortunate to have such loving parents. They gave me the freedom to explore who I was, and what was most important to me in this world.

Not only did I stop eating meat, but I had also discovered my purpose in life. Every chance I got, I wrote about how it simply made no sense for people to eat animals. Why would we kill another living being when we can easily live without inflicting such suffering? 

I couldn’t understand how anyone could love their dog and then turn around and eat a pig. I saw all creatures on this earth as equal in their right to live. And I saw us, as humans, the only species with the ability to consciously choose whether or not we eat other animals.

These strong beliefs came with a lot of weight, especially as I started getting older and discovered the truth about factory farming. I sought out information, and what I discovered was much worse than the image of Daniel Boone shooting Bambi that originally caused me to stop eating meat.

The undercover photos and videos I found of factory farmed animals felt like a knife in my gut. It was like I could feel the suffering of the animals and it tore me apart. 

When I discovered that the cruelty of the dairy and egg industries was no less than the cruelty of the meat industries I immediately went vegan. I was fifteen.

In my young mind, I thought that if only people knew the truth then surely they would go vegan like me. I didn’t see myself as different. I just thought I had discovered something other people were not yet aware of since the information back then was not readily available.

I therefore set out to spread awareness. I was a leader in a local animal rights group, organizing protests and leafleting every chance I got throughout my teenage years. 

I sat in cages on the sidewalk demonstrating the cramped conditions of chickens in battery cages. I wore buttons on my shirt at school, asking people to boycott companies that tested on animals. I led protests outside of fur stores, circuses, and pigeon shoots. I was on a mission!

PART II

After a while, I came to understand that many people simply did not WANT to know the truth about where their “food” came from. 

I was right that many people were unaware of the extent of the cruelty, but I was incorrect in thinking that simply presenting them with the information would be enough to motivate people to go vegan. This was a tough realization but it certainly didn’t stop me. I knew I’d be fighting for animals until the day I died. It was just a matter of HOW I was going to go about fighting.

Now don’t get me wrong… I believe we absolutely need those on the front line of this bloody battle. People to risk their freedom and even their lives to expose what goes on behind the closed doors of factory farms. 

We need people telling it like it is without concern for people’s feelings. I realize that may sound harsh to some, but there are millions of animals suffering, in horrible pain, and dying horrible deaths every second of every day. 

These animals, just like dogs and cats, experience love, happiness, grief, pain. If these were millions of dogs, almost everyone would be on board. They wouldn’t be calling the vegan movement “extreme”. But why? Why does a dog deserve life and love, and a cow does not? 

The problem is that people don’t want to let go of their defenses. It would make them wrong. It would mean experiencing negative emotions, including guilt, if they choose not to change their ways. Change is uncomfortable. Discomfort, however, is an investment in personal growth. Discomfort is the price of achieving not only a happy life, but also a meaningful life.

Going vegan is about wanting to make conscious choices. It’s about wanting to align your actions with what you truly value in life. It’s about not allowing yourself to say, “I love animals” and then turn around and eat their dead bodies. I learned that people have to be ready to open their minds and their hearts and care about the impact their choices make on other living beings and on the world, and to be willing to make a change.

Another important factor is believing that your voice, and your choices make a difference! Over 20 years after I led my first circus protest, in 2017, Ringling Brothers and Barnum and Bailey Circus took animals out of their acts. That’s a huge deal, and it happened in my lifetime. What’s 20 years of effort to save the countless elephants who will now be spared a life of captivity and exploitation?!

PART III

I would call the vast majority of my adult life, up until just a year ago, a period of life-experimentation, self-exploration. I experienced a lot of joy and excitement, but also dealt with a lot of shame and frustration. 

Although I would never wish many of my experiences on anyone else, I wouldn’t take back even the most painful parts. Every experience provided me with an opportunity to learn and grow. I see now just how resilient I am, and how cool is it that we can rewrite the stories we create about who we are and what we are capable of. I love knowing we are that powerful!  Let me explain.

It started with my first serious boyfriend. He was an alcoholic and a drug addict. It was during my time with him that I wrote my story about being “unworthy” and “not good enough”. From there my self-image went downhill. It was like I felt that, beyond my mission of fighting for animal rights, I really didn’t matter. 

Ella Disordered Eating Image

For the next 15 years I worked in the fitness industry and struggled in secret with a distorted body image, disordered eating, depression, anxiety, and terrible insomnia. 

Women were amazed by my strong, lean body and I was a walking billboard for the anti-stereotypes of what a vegan looked like. I inspired more people to start the transition to plant-based just by keeping myself in tip top shape, than anything else I could say or do. 

I put a ton of pressure on myself to be the shining example of a healthy, fit, vegan, which meant I couldn’t share my struggles. 

I was carrying around a lot of shame, which contributed to the disordered eating patterns. I would restrict my food intake, count calories, track macros, and walk around hungry 95% of the time. The other 5% I was binging, ashamed and alone (I could down an entire jar of peanut butter in one night).

The pressure I put on myself also led to body dysmorphia. I saw and felt fat that wasn’t there. After a devastating break-up from my fiance, I remember challenging myself to see if I could get below 100 pounds. I’m not one to lose a challenge and I managed it. I’m 5’7”.

My own food intake and weight were something I had control over. And with so much else out of my control I think that subconsciously, it gave me comfort.

PART IV

It was a long, agonizing journey for me to come to terms with, and work though, my disordered eating and body image issues. It wasn’t until 2016, many years after I had built a name for myself with my brand, Sexy Fit Vegan, that I made it my mission to change my story of being unworthy and not good enough, and to heal myself.

I had worked my ass off creating my website and blog with the purpose of educating and inspiring people, but there was a disconnect between me and the people I aimed to help. I was frustrated by the lack of engagement. 

It finally hit me like a ton of bricks… It wasn’t about people lacking the desire to engage, it was about me not being honest with them or myself. I was presenting only the good, and continuing to hide all my struggles. Who can relate to someone who appears to have it all together?!

I set out to rid myself of the shame by getting vulnerable and sharing my struggles. I decided to not only come clean to my friends and family, but to all of my followers as well, which I did in 2017 with a series of blog posts I called “My Journey from Disordered Eating to Plant-Empowered Living.” Out of sharing came a sense of empowerment like I’d never experienced before. I finally felt free in my authenticity.

Now don’t get me wrong. The negative self-talk didn’t just disappear all of a sudden. It’s a process. I discovered a self-coaching system that allowed me to consistently do the work needed to finally reprogram my brain, rid myself of the limiting beliefs keeping me stuck, step into my power, and access the happiness that is already deep within all of us!

I then developed my transformational MASTER CLASS, started the Empowered Vegan Life Facebook Group, and created the Plant-Empowered Coaching Program to serve people who not only have the desire to transition to a healthy vegan lifestyle, but are also struggling with shame, an unhealthy relationship with food and their bodies, and are engaging in self-sabotaging behaviors that are preventing them from reaching their potential.

The coolest part is that what took me years to figure out is now serving people to their freedom in just six months! 

The new program is based on true transformation through empowerment and self-love.  It’s built on the basis of aligning your actions with your values. It teaches people to approach themselves with curiosity and compassion, to accept and respect themselves and their bodies. It coaches people down the path toward not only a healthy and happy life, but also a free and meaningful life. It coaches people to a place where they become the inspiration for others and make a positive impact in the world.

And though the program successfully helps people adopt a healthy, fit, vegan lifestyle, the focus in not about food! You see, for the people I work with, feeling powerless over food is just a symptom. And the countless diet plans and training programs they’d been beating themselves up over, were attempts at putting Band-aids on wounds that needed major surgery. 

And this leads me to where I am today! Continuing to spread my message of veganism through empowerment, through aligning your actions with your values and rewriting your story with self-love as the foundation.

10 Jun 2019
Going Vegan Tips, Vegan Lifestyle
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3 Top Tips for Traveling Like a Sexy Fit Vegan Pro

Traveling as a vegan has become DRAMATICALLY easier the last couple of years (I would know, as I’ve been a traveling vegan for 24 years!)

Even airports are starting to get on board the vegan train thanks in part to the mass distribution of products like the Beyond Burger and the Impossible Burger, which are even hitting fast food joints like BurgerFi and Burger King.

My boyfriend recently texted me a photo of himself at the airport, excited to report he was chowing on a bagel with Daiya cream cheese!

Even though sticking with your healthy vegan lifestyle while traveling has become easier in some cities, it can still pose a challenge in less progressive areas, especially for vegan newbies, hence why I’m writing this article.

Here are my top 3 tips for traveling like a sexy fit vegan pro…

#1: Prepare Healthy, Hearty Food for the Plane

Many people often limit themselves to bringing only snack foods, like trail mix, chips, and candy with them on the plane. Instead, I have found that leaving the snacks behind, and instead bringing hearty, whole foods-based mini-meals works much better. That way, when I get hungry, I can eat something that is both healthy and satisfying, with the result of arriving at my destination feeling fantastic!

My “go-to” plane food is a chickpea salad I make by simply throwing together chickpeas, halved grape tomatoes, black olives, and avocado, tossing this with a little olive oil and Herbamare seasoning, and then adding micro-green sprouts and sunflower seeds. This meal is delicious, nutrient-packed, and keeps me feeling satiated for hours!

Start experimenting, and before long you’ll have your own “go-to’s” for your trips and it will be a no-brainer!

#2: Do our Research in Advance & Prepare Accordingly

There are many awesome apps now to help you navigate the food options in cities all over the world. Happy Cow is the oldest and possibly the most extensive website and app for finding vegan and vegan-friendly spots to eat.

Social media is also a great place to do your research these days by connecting with vegans in the places you’re traveling to. When I went to London last year for example, I join the “London Vegans” Facebook Group and was able to get great advice about vegan-friendly restaurants and markets.

To avoid getting hangry on your trip (which can really put a damper on one’s vacay), I recommend making sure you know where there is a market close to where you’re staying so that you can at least pick up a few items when you arrive, like apples and peanut butter to keep around as a snack (especially if you’re staying at a hotel without a refrigerator for restaurant leftovers).

 #3: Adopt an “Adventure Mindset”

If you’re familiar with my work, you already know I’m all about developing an empowered mindset, which allows people to make conscious, intentional, and mindful choices.

When traveling, I encourage you to leave your expectations at home, and think of the trip as an adventure, including making it fun to find the best vegan food in the city you’re visiting! Without expectations, you eliminate disappointment.

Doing research ahead of time is extremely helpful, but there can be  hidden gems that don’t show up on apps. Ask the locals!

Instead of relying solely on Yelp or Happy Cow, consider asking around once you arrive at your destination so that you don’t limit yourself to the more touristy restaurants and markets. I’ve found myself spending tons of time doing research in advance only to find that the best places end up being the spots that the locals have recommended. So take your eyes off the screens and interact with real people and have yourself an adventure!

29 Apr 2019
Vegan Lifestyle
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Lessons from “Those People” Who Walk Their Dogs in Strollers

I have a fun little story with a huge life lesson to share with you…

It was a Saturday afternoon and I had just finished kickboxing class, riding my post-workout high.

I started on the walk to my boyfriend’s place with my chihuahua Shye. Shye is about 12 years old with a huge personality and the spirit of a fighter. She is the unofficial Sobekick mascot… She practically owns the place! 

She’s in great health when it comes to her internal organs. She has, however started to struggle what arthritis and can’t always walk the long distances she used to.

Now let me preface the next part of this story by saying that if you had told me 10 years ago that I’d be walking down the streets of South Beach pushing my dog in a stroller, I would have laughed uncontrollably. I would have said there is no way in hell I’m going to be one of those people who pushes their dog in a stroller… and yet there I was, pushing my dog in a stroller!

As I saw the looks from some of the people passing by a few things occurred to me. First, I realized that many of those people were probably thinking, “How ridiculous!” or “That’s SO South Beach” or even “That poor dog… Dogs need to walk!” Then I thought, “I was just like those people, thinking those thoughts not all that long ago!”

The second realization was that I truly did NOT care that I was being judged!  I walked proudly with Shye happily riding in, what we named, her “Rover!” This was proof that all the empowerment work I’ve done for myself the last many years has and continues to shift my state of being from one operating in part from a place of shame and anxiety, to one of love and confidence.

For the rest of our walk I wore a perma-grin, feeling energized, empowered, and oh so grateful to be moving through life with the tools I now have.

I’m sharing this experience with you because I am dedicated to helping you achieve the self-worth, freedom, and abundance that my Plant-Empowered Coaching Program clients and I now embody.

If my story resonates with you, I encourage you to attend my powerful online Master Class, The 5-Step System Our Clients Use to Easily Adopt an EMPOWERED VEGAN LIFESTYLE and Start Loving the Skin They’re In!

We’re offering for FREE for a limited time HERE, so I encourage you to check it out now!

08 Apr 2019
Empowerment, Guest Blog Posts, Vegan Lifestyle
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The Extraordinary Gifts of Loneliness & a GIFT!

If you caught me on the summit, click HERE for your gifts…

And then check out this incredible article by our head mindset coach Stephanie Aguilar!

I’d been wanting to crawl out of my own skin for weeks.  

My generally humorous approach to life had left me shivering in my own unbidden sadness. My normal focused and analytical head was traded for a mush-mind that I did not recognize. I felt as if I were simply walking through my days in a misty disconnect from myself and everyone around me. In the middle of my chest was an ache, one that radiated at times to my throat, arms, and belly. Tears entered my eyes with every sad song, heartfelt gesture, and beautiful quote turned into an internet meme.

One Saturday evening, I was alone in the kitchen, and I was struck, almost to the floor, with a realization.  I was lonely. I was profoundly lonely. In my bones, I was lonely. In my eyes, I was lonely. In my heart, I was lonely. Through my entire body, I was lonely. Instead of pushing this loneliness away with a bag of Doritos and a Netflix binge of House of Cards, I decided to dig into the loneliness and see what was there for me.  And here’s where my lonely-heart story gets interesting.

Giving My Loneliness a Wink

Loneliness is an emotion that we humans avoid and deflect with everything we have.  It’s an emotion that we rarely HAVE to face, though it is as common a human experience as any. Yes, we feel it, but do we really have to face it? I didn’t. With endless ways to distract myself and make superficial connections within seconds that would put it off, actually looking my loneliness in the face seemed not only terrifying but completely foreign. Yet, I was compelled to dive in to see what was there.

I wasn’t interested in the WHY… that was simple enough… but I wanted to know what was in the loneliness for me. David Gandelman, founder of Groundedmind.com, says in his meditation on loneliness, “The more we try to avoid loneliness the more we feed it… but what happens if we walk deep into our own hearts and meet that loneliness?” And with that terrifying inspiration, I walked deep into my heart and gave my loneliness a wink.

I found in my loneliness that I was ashamed. I was embarrassed to be lonely. I have love in my life.  I have friends and family and colleagues and clients that I am connected to and love deeply. And, still, my chest ached with feelings of isolation and being misunderstood and alone.

In my curiosity, I uncovered something really unexpected. I am ashamed of my loneliness not because I believe I have no reason to be lonely but because I am afraid my loneliness diminishes my independence. It is my most cherished quality and yet, my irrational shame was centered on this thought that if I am lonely, I must be weak. If I am lonely, I must not be able to stand alone. If I am lonely, I must be unlovable.

Whoa! That wink had just turned into a full-on, in-your-face, slap-your-mamma-to-Tuesday kind of moment. And just as unexpectedly, my loneliness gave me some gifts.

The Big Reveal

First, my loneliness gave me the gift of vulnerability. I am an open book when it comes to my past shame. I will tell you about my failed relationships. I will talk for hours about my eating disorder. I will even tell you all about my early false starts at motherhood. But, sharing my in-the-moment, private thoughts and inner-most shame is another matter entirely.

Brene Brown says, “Vulnerability is not knowing victory or defeat. It’s understanding the necessity of both; it’s engaging. It’s being all in.” And so, in this loneliness and shame, I was all in. I bared my present shame to three people in one day… my two best friends and a complete stranger on Instagram. I said these exact words, “I am profoundly lonely” not knowing if I could trust myself to actually say the shameful words or the people I chose to tell and doing it anyway. And the remarkable thing was this: With the shame exposed, the loneliness lost its power.

My chest still ached. I still felt incredibly alone and misunderstood. But, I was in the light of vulnerability, and the loneliness lost its power. No longer did I feel the need to hide and run away from this emotion. I no longer felt like I needed to hide in a sleeve of oreos or scroll Facebook for hours.  Instead, I was ready to “say hello to my loneliness” as David Gandelman further invites in his meditation.

After exposing my shame, I found that I have the strength to be lonely. I am capable of being lonely while still being me. I did not fall apart. I was not a mess. I found I can sit with my loneliness and carry it around until I am done with it and it is done with me.  

Susan David, author of Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life, says, “We still don’t like the things we don’t like—we just cease to be at war with them.  And once the war is over, change can begin.” I don’t like being lonely, but I am now willing to lay down my ineffective weapons against loneliness because I found that the battle was not one that could be won.  And when I did that, I stepped into the realization that the loneliness was bringing me to the warrior heart I had completely dismissed.

Discovering the Irony

I think that we often fight against our emotions not because we are strong but because we believe ourselves to be completely incapable of sitting with the difficult emotions. We go into battle with distraction and incomparable replacements and all of those other weapons that ultimately fail.  The truth is if I did not face my loneliness, I would not know my capabilities, and isn’t that the irony here? My avoidance of loneliness was due to my shame and perceived dependence on others, when in actuality, my loneliness brought me to a strength I had not yet realized I had.

Through this strength, I started to uncover the causes of my loneliness. I am lonely because I love easily and yet, accepting love is very hard for me.  I am lonely because I have spent the last decade and a half nurturing everyone around me and neglecting to cultivate the friendships that feed my soul. I am lonely because I have often chosen isolation over adventure. I am lonely because I am human.

“Life’s beauty is inseparable from its fragility,“ Susan David says in an unparalleled way. I am human and fragile, and that is part of my beauty. My aching loneliness is preparing me for a gorgeous dance, one in which I will feel that inherent beauty and one that only I can create. I am not empty;  I am raw.

Since I am now fully available to accept the penetrating awareness of my loneliness, I am finding that I am deepening in compassion for all. The startling fact is, the loneliness is creating more space for love and purpose and a fullness that I have not yet experienced because I was too busy keeping loneliness at bay.

As Peme Chödrö states in her work, The Places that Scare You, “Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.” Let me know my darkness. The world needs my compassion. It does not need another pretender.

My work, both as a client and as a coach in the Plant-Empowered Coaching Program, didn’t bring me to the superficial conclusion that I must be positive at any cost. Working through the process brought me to the belief that I am strong beyond the thoughts and emotions that fuel me as a human.

Only I am in charge of my happiness and meaning in this life. No one else has that contract with me but me. And despite my fragility and loneliness, I love all that I am enough to give every emotion a wink and say hello, then take it for a fantastic, terrifying ride. It isn’t enough to recognize the emotion, and through the Program I learned that I am powerful enough to take control of the thoughts that don’t serve me and view my emotions with compassion and curiosity rather than shoving them to the side to be dealt with at a later date.  This is the power of the process. This is the power of freedom. This is the power that is me.

11 Mar 2019
Empowerment, Guest Blog Posts, Holistic Health, Vegan Lifestyle
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10 Foolproof Ways to Be an Awesome Parent

During my 4.5 years of being a mother, I have noticed myself go from, “I am rocking this mom thing” to “I am screwing my child up for life” in a matter of 60 seconds.

I strive (daily) to be a good mother but this is the most challenging job I have ever had and it will be the job I am assigned to for the rest of my life… There is no retirement from parenting.  It is very stressful at times and I lose my cool more often than I like to admit.

I grew up with a screaming parent.  I had decided at a very young age that I would NEVER be that mom.  I wanted my children to feel loved and supported and for their feelings to be validated instead of shunning them for not obeying or losing my temper over their simple curiosity and comedic impulses. I wanted to be that parent who understands that children just want acceptance and hugs.  I read many books about child development and how to be calm, cool and collected at all times in this ever-changing job position.

But this morning, as I was having a screaming war with my son over brushing his teeth before school, I saw his small body trembling with anger and exhausted from the battle and I realized that I have allowed myself to lose sight of who he is… I have allowed myself to fall into patterns of behavior instead of using the tools I have learned about child-parent dynamics… I have allowed myself to be that screaming parent… and I crumbled. My beautiful boy deserves better.

So, I went back to some insights I have accumulated throughout the years to center my thoughts.  I am amazed at the calm I feel just by reading them out loud to myself. I am even more amazed that I have lost sight of so many of these thoughts for one reason or another over time.  My reality of parenting has not been jiving with my intentions and it is time for a check-in:

1)   Good parenting means taking care of yourself first.

Think of it the same as you are taught on an airplane… you must put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you can help anyone else.  If you neglect your own body and mind, you are really neglecting your child’s, as well. We cannot give a warm drink to someone with an empty carafe. Eat well, sleep well, exercise your body and take time to breathe and you can go into situations with enough understanding and awareness to make sure everyone wins. (This is something Ella certainly drives home in the Plant-Empowered Coaching Program.)

2)   Being imperfect is absolutely perfect.  

No one is perfect!  How beautiful and freeing that statement feels.  So many children are being taught that being wrong about something holds a bad connotation.  I remember being in school and being terrified to raise my hand because I was afraid of answering incorrectly and (possibly) being ridiculed by my teachers and peers over it.  

As an adult I realize that being wrong is important to learn anything. Do we ever truly learn from being right all the time? Our own focus on perfection trickles down to our children… whether it be about grades, appearance, weight or the like. Just as it is important for adults to know and practice this idea, it is even more vital for children to be comfortable with making mistakes and with being imperfect for their own mental health.  As adults, we can reason on a different level than children, whose brains are developing well into teen-hood. They are more susceptible to allowing negative thoughts about themselves and others to take over their lives.  Teach them that there is nothing wrong with a challenge and to welcome imperfection with a smile.

3)  Being mindful is more important than being in control.

The times when I am fighting for control are the times when I have lost control completely.  When I stop to take a breath to snap out of that space, my body is shaking from anger and my son is either screaming at me or crying because I hurt his feelings.  At that point, it feels like it is too late for this fight to come to a calm conclusion. If I had just opened my eyes to look at him and asked what he needed or wanted, it would have changed the course of the entire situation. Instead, I scoop him up and hold him in my arms and apologize over and over again, allowing the guilt to run so deeply that I ache in my fingertips.

Children’s feelings are often bigger than them and it is our job as the adult to help them to understand their emotions and focus their reactions appropriately.  Next time you feel that pit of anger welling up because your child is doing the exact opposite of what you think he should do… take a breath and walk away so that you can focus on his needs and to help him to work through his feelings.

4)   Take time to play and get in touch with your inner child.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “It is a happy talent to know how to play.”  Embracing the nostalgia of what made childhood so great is all about freedom to just have fun, to be outside, to run wildly, to explore, to play a game, to sing, to dance and to, simply, take time to laugh heartily.

While our idea of fun has changed quite a bit as we have aged, I have never seen a person, at any age, with a frown on her face while doing something she loves.  Play with your kiddo as often as possible… remind yourself what it was like to be that young… embrace it and do it often. Show your mini that you are never too old to have fun.

5)   It’s okay to be late.  

Let’s face it, when you have children, being on-time for anything goes out the window.  IT’S OK! It is not the end of the world and people usually understand (and if they don’t, that’s OK, too).  I am not saying be an hour late and expect that others will let it go… but being ten minutes late is not a make-or-break situation.  Don’t stress yourself and your child out by pushing perfection here.

6)   My house is clean enough to be healthy and dirty enough to be happy.

My mother had this sign hanging on the kitchen wall for my entire childhood.  While we always had a clean home, my mother never worried if our toys were in the living room because that meant we were having fun and that was more important to her than having everything in its place at all times.

Before I had my son, I had a rigid cleaning schedule for my home. I even had a calendar to remind me what to clean and when.  I realized very quickly into parenthood that that way of being caused me more anxiety than anything else. I had to let go a bit and know that the “Cleaning Police” were not going to barge into my house and take me away if there was a little dust on the mantle. If there is a choice between spending time with your family or cleaning… choose family and enjoy every minute.

7)   My child loves me unconditionally.  

I am always amazed that, no matter how many times I “mess up” this parenting thing, my son always gives me a kiss and hug before bed. He never holds onto the anger or resents me for my reactions.  He only wants to know that I will always love him, back. He wants my approval, my guidance, my arms to hug him and for me to play with him as often as possible. Children tend to be more forgiving than adults… we should take a lesson from them.  

8)   It’s okay to give in.  

There are times when I ask myself, “Would you rather be right, or would you rather be happy?”  Not everything has to be something. If it doesn’t matter that much, then don’t make it a bigger deal than it needs to be just to prove a point.  It’s ok to let something go and give in to your child sometimes… you will not ruin him or make him a menace to society if an argument ends with you saying, “You know what? I don’t want to fight anymore… just eat the cookie for dinner and enjoy it.”  Pick your battles.

9)   Children are always testing their wings, not you!  

More often than not, children are trying to see the extent of their own abilities.  They are not purposefully trying to piss you off… it’s not personal. They want to be strong, independent and reach their dreams whether that means wearing the same Superman shirt everyday or climbing to the highest point on the playground.  They don’t know how you feel about the situation and they usually don’t care (children are naturally egocentric… their world is the only world). It’s more about living moment to moment for them rather than whatever consequences will follow.

Take time to explain to them what can happen, or why you are angry, or how they can make better choices rather than yelling at them for not doing something the way you want them to.  They might not always agree or understand, but they will likely feel more loved and respected if you talk with them rather than at them.

10)    I am enough!

There will be plenty of times when you will doubt your abilities and feel like you can do better.  I am a firm believer that the Universe gives us what we need when we need it. Our children challenge us to be better than we’ve ever been before and the Universe would never have done that if it didn’t know that we are ready for it.  You are enough.. in fact, you are more than enough. You are an AWESOME parent!

 

04 Mar 2019
Empowerment, Vegan Lifestyle
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How to Change the Stories Keeping You Stuck to Turn Your Dreams Into Reality

What is one thing in your life you tell yourself you can’t do? ​​

We talk a great deal about stories in the Plant-Empowered Coaching Program, because the stories we create in our heads determine our reality.

What is one thing in your life you tell yourself you can’t do, as if you’re stating fact? It could be something like, “I can’t go totally vegan,” or “I can’t start my own business,” or “I can’t run a marathon.”

​​News flash! This is just a story, and chances are you are making it your reality out of fear… Fear brought on by limiting beliefs about who you are and what you’re capable of.

Here’s the deal though… You are so much more powerful than your limiting beliefs! This is something we challenge people to address within the Plant-Empowered Coaching Program.

​​For many, the Program provides a life-changing opportunity to face their fears and tackle their shame so that they can use their talents to show up in the world in a way that is congruent with their life’s purpose.

Many people walk around their entire lives searching for solutions to their problems with the hope that once they lose the weight, get out of debt, find the right partner, or get offered the promotion, that they’ll then become happy, feel at peace, and find freedom.

The flaw in those thoughts is that happiness, peace, and freedom do not come from a change in your circumstances. Happiness, peace, and freedom are available to you right now, because they are already deep within you.

​​The tools we teach in the Program are the tools most people are missing to be able to step into their power, look inward, dig deep, and move forward with confidence in their lives. I challenge you to tell yourself that you are done robbing yourself of the FREEDOM and ENERGY available to you.

​​Ask yourself… What story are you telling yourself that is keeping you stuck? For many it’s about finances. Money, however, is just a form of energy, and by making decisions from a place of abundance, you are creating a life of abundance.

Anxiety about finances is one of the biggest challenges for people considering enrolling in the Program. What those who enroll understand though, is that making the investment in themselves means the energy, money included, will come back to them tenfold!

What we help you do in the Program, is to embody the REAL YOU, the AUTHENTIC YOU. The person who always makes the “safe” choice and retreats back into their comfort zone is the inauthentic you. I am so grateful that my team and I have the honor of coaching people through the process of discovering and embodying the real you!

Hear what Program graduate Jamie Rottura had to say about making the huge leap of faith and how it changed her life forever!

19 Feb 2019
Empowerment, Guest Blog Posts, Vegan Lifestyle
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What is the Body Neutrality Movement?

The past few years, the media has begun to tell women to love their bodies regardless of their size while at the same time hypocritically continuing to use the same models with the same “ideal” proportions. While those proposing all women shower themselves with body self-love meant well, the message nevertheless often felt hollow and phony to those with physiques that didn’t match the images we’re still seeing.

Additionally, some of those in the health care field felt that while teaching women to love their bodies no matter what reaped psychological benefits, it ignored the reality of the potential health risks associated with obesity.

A recent response to all things body-positive focuses instead on a neutral acceptance of ones’ physical appearance while still admitting room for improvement exists. The body neutrality movement offers a more authentic way for women to end negative self-talk while still focusing on achieving physical fitness to avoid future health woes.

Similarly, Ella’s Plant-Empowered Coaching Program is based on the philosophy that accepting, respecting, and loving yourself exactly as you are is a PRE-REQUISITE for changing your body. This is because when you make food and fitness choices out of love for yourself, and respect for you values (e.g. compassion for animals), you take discipline and will power out of the equation. Nutritious vegan food becomes a form of self-care, which becomes a priority when you develop true self-love. (If this resonates with you, be sure to attend Ella’s powerful master class on the 5 Steps to Ditch Diets and Adopt a Healthy Vegan Lifestyle you Love.)

Let’s now explore how the body neutrality movement came about, and what it can show us about the future of helping all people accept themselves regardless of size or weight.

What Does Body Neutrality Mean?

Body neutrality encourages women to practice true self-love by accepting their physical realities and making choices that promote good health. Body neutrality challenges women to objectively evaluate their bodies, not in a critical way, but rather by honestly assessing their strengths and challenges.

Unlike the body positivity movement that preached love of self regardless of ones’ diet and exercise habits, those embracing body neutrality not only accept their physical limitations but also take proactive steps to improve their diets and overall health.

Those practicing a body neutrality path take personal responsibility for engaging in behaviors that lead to poor health outcomes. This doesn’t equate to beating themselves up over an occasional (vegan) doughnut indulgence or skipping a single workout, but they do take note of these less-than-healthy behaviors to prevent them from turning into daily habits. In addition to accepting their physical realities, followers acknowledge the factors and influences that contributed to their excess body fat without allowing them to become excuses for poor health habits.

Which Approach Works Better — Body Positivity or Body Neutrality?

Both the body positivity movement and the more recent body neutrality movement offer benefits to many women. Even experts in fitness and nutrition disagree as to which approach works better for each individual.

Experts do agree that tying ones’ sense of self-worth to anything related to physical appearance wastes valuable emotional energy that could best be spent elsewhere. Tying ones’ sense of self-worth to physical appearance can lead to mental health issues such as depression and eating disorders. Taking either approach, body positivity or body neutrality, can benefit those whose body size interferes with achieving a sense of happiness and satisfaction in life.

Some women feel most comfortable practicing a combination of body positivity and body neutrality. It’s natural to feel elated after completing a vigorous run or tough fitness class. However, we all have certain days when we feel down or experience disappointments, such as gaining a pound due to normal female hormonal cycles. Part of body neutrality involves treating the self gently and refusing to let one setback completely derail progress toward improved health.

Some nutritionists and fitness experts consider body neutrality a stepping stone toward true self-love of our physical bodies. While this may hold true in some cases, women should take care to reward themselves simply for making healthier decisions overall, not just reaching their ideal weight or pants size.

In this sense, self-care isn’t just about weight. It’s also about things like preventive medicine, scheduling annual checkups, taking care of your bones and skin, staying properly hydrated and understanding the value of eating a wide variety of whole plant foods daily. Self-care is an ongoing project that doesn’t end just because you shed that extra 15 pounds from the holidays. When in doubt, practice this kind of self-care above all else.

Embracing Body Neutrality for a Healthier Life

Those wishing to adopt body neutrality in their own lives can begin by taking an honest and objective assessment of their physical selves. Which daily practices encourage good health, and which areas can be improved? For example, one woman may do an excellent job of attending regular fitness classes after work but may also overindulge in highly processed foods with little nutritional value. Another may consume more carrots than Bugs Bunny but resists breaking a sweat.

Focus on correcting one unhealthy habit at a time. Beginning a new fitness regimen while also attempting to stick to a diet can lead to feelings of disappointment. When the inevitable slip-ups occur, avoid letting one bad day evolve into a bad week or month. Practicing forgiveness and kindness toward oneself is an important part of developing a positive mental outlook.

The body neutrality movement can offer many women a more realistic alternative to expressions of self-love that often ring hollow. By focusing on improving health outcomes over developing the so-called “perfect” body, we can learn to love ourselves by making healthier choices one decision at a time. There’s no greater expression of self-love than keeping both mind and body healthy.

08 Dec 2018
Empowerment, Vegan Lifestyle
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Why Self-Love is the Ultimate Gift to the World

My yoga teacher instructed the class to give yourself a big hug and say, “I love me!” the other day. Most people in the class giggled, a few people rolled their eyes, and a couple others took the request very seriously. What would you have done?

I was a giggler. A few years ago I would have laughed it off completely. Even though I giggled this time, I didn’t brush it off. All I could think about was the transformational power of self-love, as demonstrated by countless clients whose lives have been forever changed by the teaching we are now doing at Vegan Life Coach Academy.

For me, overcoming shame by learning to love myself unconditionally was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done (it only took me 35 years ;)). It was also the most empowering thing I’ve ever accomplished. There is simply NO WAY anyone can even come close to reaching their true potential and living a meaningful life without having unconditional love for oneself.

At some point in my teenage years I created the story that I was not enough. Who I was and what I was capable of would never be good enough. I hid behind my strong conviction for saving animals.

For well over a decade I suffered in silence. My passion for veganism was what got me out of bed every morning. Understanding my purpose on this earth, to fight for the rights of animals, kept me going day in and day out despite the depression, anxiety, disordered eating, distorted body image, and insomnia I was experiencing.

Although I knew logically what was going on, (I had my Master’s Degree in Social Work and recognized the shame) I could not for the life of me figure out how to truly love myself.

What I didn’t realize was the amount of courage it was going to take to heal. Why courage? As Brene Brown says, “The antidote to shame is vulnerability,” and when I finally was able to figure out how to share my story, without being attached to the outcome (other people’s opinions), I was able to finally take my power back.

Wondering how this relates to veganism, fitness, and the holidays? I’ll tell you!

First of all, veganism is all about acting according to your values, and as I teach in the Coaching Program, this requires you to be able to make conscious and mindful choices about what you eat and how you live. It is impossible to consistently make the choices that will serve you best if you don’t love yourself. When I say “serve you best” I mean physically, mentally, AND emotionally.

When it comes to fitness, at the Vegan Life Coach Academy we talk about exercising because you love your body, not because you hate it. And how do you expect to love your body, no matter what shape you’re in, if you don’t love yourself as a whole being?

Last, the holidays are a time to spread love generously. Only when we love and take care of ourselves can we truly love and take care of others. It’s that simple. You can’t give away what you don’t have.

I encourage you to give yourself the most life-changing gift you could ever receive this year… the gift of self-love. Rest assured that your self-love will also be a gift to everyone around you as well.

If this resonates with you, and you’re ready to do the work it takes to learn how to eat, move, and live in a way that will bring you not only health and happiness, but also a meaningful life, I encourage you to check out our new Visionaries Membership. We help our members face the blocks that are keeping them stuck and the hurdles that are standing in their way in order to put a game plan together for them to move powerfully forward in your life. There is never a “right” or “convenient” time to dive into this tough, transformational work, so why wait? Let’s do this!!

04 Dec 2018
Empowerment, Going Vegan Tips, Vegan Lifestyle
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Beyond Survival… How to Thrive As a Vegan Over the Holidays

Wouldn’t it be fantastic if the holiday season was a time when you were able to simply focus on spreading love, experiencing joy, and spending valuable time with family? How incredible would it feel to be free from all the extra pressure you put on yourself to make sure everyone else is happy? What would it mean to you to be free from secretly stressing about how you’re going to avoid splurging too much and gaining that extra weight you seem to pack on before heading into every New Year (when you plan to have a “fresh start” of course)?

As I mentioned in my last blog post, the holidays used to be an incredibly stressful time for me due to my struggles with disordered eating and a distorted body image. If that’s a struggle for you too, check out last week’s post as well as the Facebook Live event we did in the Empowered Vegan Life Facebook Group.

The focus of this post is on the other stressor that many of our Plant-Empowered Coaching Program clients also face… Being vegan around critical relatives who just don’t get it.   

I’ve got great news for you!  I’m here to help you write a new story for your holiday this year.

It’s important to first understand that you have no control over how other people think, feel, or act. Therefore, you must let go of trying to change anyone else and focus on “doing you!”

This year, instead of apologizing for being “difficult,” I encourage you to be proud and confident about your decision to go vegan. Don’t play small and hide.

Think about it… By acting (eating) in line with your values you’re setting an incredible example for those you love, no matter how hard a time they give you. I invite you to be unattached to the outcomes and simply shine your light on those around you. Then, instead of jumping to conclusions, sit back and observe what happens with curiosity and compassion (which is also how our clients learn to approach THEMSELVES)!

Choosing a mantra or two to say to yourself every time someone is critical or pushes your buttons can really help. Some of my favorites are:

“No one can make me feel inferior without my consent.”

“They are doing the best they can with what they have.”

“The only approval I need is my own.”

“What they say is a reflection of them, not me.

”I choose to courageously speak my truth with love.”

Will this be uncomfortable at first? Yes! Do it anyway! Head to your gathering without expectations. Bring a vegan dish or two to share. Focus on the precious time with your family instead of focusing on the food and eating. All too often we don’t consider that time with family precious until those people have passed. Living in gratitude makes all the difference in the world.

Basically, consciously using the holiday as an opportunity to work on YOURSELF is key to continue powerfully down the path to not only a health and happy life, but also a meaningful life.